15 April 2011

Ntahla..

"Do you know people that die will turn into a star?'
"Only if they are good people!"
"So you are so not going to be a star Nazu !
"We will see then!"

If only I knew. If only I saw what she tried to tell me all this while. If only we saw it coming.
  My name is Nuna. And as I am gazing at the sky,I saw a huge star twinkling brightest among the others. And I know that is Qis.
  Nazu was..my..best friend. She was the one who I laughed the loudest with,who lend me her shoulder when I`m in trouble,who listened while everybody else was talking..who knew I prefer chocolate then vanilla. Who is
  Dead.
  The word send a shiver up through my spine. As if only yesterday we joke about how lame a movie is. I remembered that night. We were watching a movie entitled "Stars". And while others are crying and sobbing,I put my hand on my mouth to stop myself from giggling.
  "I have told you Nuna. People turn into stars when they died!"
  "That was just a story. And a lame one. Get over it."
  And Nazu was quiet for the rest of the walk.
  I should have seen her sadness.I should have asked her what was wrong. Instead,I bought an ice cream and shove it to her. She took it and while we ate,Nazu seemed to be thinking of something. We were quiet and the sounds of nearby funfare filled the air. I could see that she was trying to tell me something. And when she opened her mouth,it startled me when I felt snocked.
  "Nuna,may I ask you for something?"
  My ice cream was dripping that I only listened to her half-heartedly.
  "Sure,what is it?"
  Nazu seemed hesitated. It looked like she was gathering her courage to say something which made me wonder why,since we never had any secrets before.
  When I die,can you not cry?"
  I was startled. I asked her to repeat it again. She smiled and turned her back towards me.
  "When I die,I want nobody to cry. I want everybody to pray for me and live their life as if nothing had happened. And you..."
  She took my hands.
  "I want you to look at the star and think of me all the best thing that ever happened in your life".
  I was not thingking very well at that time. I really thought she was joking. Nazu was infamous foe her drama queen act. Si instead of promising,I burst out laughing,Nazu smiled. I think she knew I was not buying her words.
  "The star is what I will be."
  It took a very long time for me to stop myself from giggling. Nazu always made jokes about her marriage,her children and now,her death? I guess she jokes about everything.
  After eating the ice-cream(my ice-cream fell on the ground since I laugh too hard),we went to the amusement park not far from there. Nazu was her normal self again,joking and laughing and tickling. We went for a couple of ride(I even went for the moving cups),then we went home. Our house were separated by two blocks away,so we went our separated way. I dozed off without even having the time to think about the night.
  Early morning,(not too early then,since my mom kept on knocking the door) I woke up and got dress. I guess I felt something weird was about to happen that I got dress quickly. Then,I went downstairs. I was shocked to see Aunt Wati,Nazu`s mom sitting on the couch. Her eyes were puffy,and she was barely able to form a sound. I wonder what had happened. I tried to calm her,and after a while she told me the news. A shocking news.
  Nazu is dying.
  My best friend is dying.
  Aunt Wati said that she was diagnosed with brain cancer. They found it out too late,and Nazu did not want to go for the treatment. And last night,after she went out with me,she fainted at the porch without anybody realising a thing. Her brother found her in front of the doorstep numb and not moving. They sent her to the hospital where the doctor told them that there was no hope left.
  I was startled. She never told me a thing. And last night,she was very happy. Last night we had talked about boys and movies. And last night...
  "The star is what I will be."
  I cried when Aunt Wati hugged me. I cried in the car on the way to the hospital. I cried again when I saw Nazu smiling at me on the bed. She smelled of medicine and doctors. She smelled like a burned candle. She smelled like..
  Goodbye.
  Nazu took my hand and whispered slowly in my aers. My hands are cold and my hearts are numb. When the words registered in my brain,I barely able to stand still.
  "Remember the stars"
  Nazu died that night. I was besides her all the time. My eyes are swollen from crying too much. But my heart are numb by her sudden deadth. I never thought she will go like this. But as day passed,I accept the fact and finally I was able to live my life again.
  I gazed at the satr again. It has been six years since Nazu left me. I am twenty-three now. I am a Harvard graduate. I am starting mu internship in a engineer organization next week. But whoever I am now,whoever I had met through my six years without her,I never find anybody like her.
  She is not only a buddy. She is not only my neighbour. And she is difinitely not only my best friend.
  She is my sister.
  "I want you to look at the stars and think of me as the best thingthat ever happened in your life."
  My tears drop on my cheek. I will pray for you Nazu. And do not worry. We will meet again one day.
  As I walk back,I turn my head for the very last moment. There,at the sky Nazu is twinkling her eyes at me. I know that is her.
  Because she is the brightest of all.


*Cerite ini hanyalah rekaan smate2 untk mwujudkan k`asyikan trhadap bntang. Xde kne mngene dgn mne2 phak sme ade yg msih idop mhupun yg tlah mninggal dunie. Trimas~

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